Advice number 4

Dear Abby,

I really need your help with some of my problems. There is this one person that I know loves me but sometimes I feel like this certain person doesn’t. I feel like this because he never shows it. Yes he supports my family and everything and he is amazing. But he has a huge problem and a disease that is killing him. This certain person has an alcohol problem. Its hurting me inside to know that he is killing himself. He has put my family through hell by everything that he is doing to himself and us. I have no idea what to do anymore. I love this person with all my heart but with him doing this to us is really hard to deal with. This disease is taking over his body. He is so addicted that he can’t stop. He always tries to stop and he ALWAYS promises he will stop. But it has been over 14 years he has been promising us. I can’t even trust him anymore. He is always telling us that he is supporting us and getting us everything we need but that’s not all I need. I need love. I would rather be a homeless and have a family that spends time together. That actually takes his time to spend time with his family. He is always telling us that he loves us but he never shows it to us because he is always out drinking or starting a fight. Or even leaving us. Family time means something to my sisters, mother, and I but we never get a chance to actually have REAL family time. Family time is everybody in your family. Dad, Mom, Sisters, brothers, pets. Usually in my house, the family time is with my sisters, mom and I.

No matter how many problems a family has, a child should never be put on the spot of choosing between one parent and another. An adult choosing to be a parent means that they need to actually care about the child, listen to their problems, and give them advice. I don’t get any of those by this certain person because he is never home for me to talk to. And if he is he is either drunk starting a fight with my mom and my sisters get involved with the wrong situations or else he is sleeping. I need help by knowing what to do. Its either my mom gets a divorce with my father or we stay at home and have a life that is worthless. I believe that right now everybody in the whole world is in hell. Once we all are in heaven or hell that is when life will begin for me because I know I will go to Heaven and I know my family will to. Even though people make mistakes doesn’t mean they are bad people. I know my father isn’t a bad person. And that is when my life will begin. I am a 14 year old girl that is stressed out and scared to even be in my own house. I can’t take it anymore. He knows we all love him but he has lost all his trust for me. I can’t trust him anymore because he has promised us our whole lives he will get help and he still hasn’t. I don’t know what to do anymore. I will love him forever but I don’t know if I can take it anymore. I am sick of life and everything. Is there anything that I can do to help him? Is there anything we can do to show him what he is putting us through? I don’t know what to do anymore. I just need some good advice. PLEASE!!

Anonymous/
Advice Number 4